Trump Re-Nominates FEMA Chief He Fired For Saying FEMA Should Exist
Cameron Hamilton returns to lead agency after being escorted out for defending its existence
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Trump Administration Proposes Solving Government Building Maintenance Issues with Literal Magic Paint
The White House has formally submitted plans to coat the Eisenhower Executive Office Building with what Trump calls 'magic paint.' Preservation experts warn the miracle coating could cause irreversible damage to the 1888 structure.
Nation's King Graciously Permits Millions to Publicly Protest Nation's King
Eight to nine million Americans freely assembled to announce that free assembly is under threat. The king, who is not a king, was unavailable for comment. The deleted video was also unavailable.
House Adjourns Itself Before Congressman Can Finish Sentence, Sets New Land Speed Record
The complete official transcript of the session runs to one sentence. A war continued unaffected. Rep. Ivey's mouth remained open. The gavel has been secured.
From the Govment Archives
Trump Re-Nominates FEMA Chief He Fired For Saying FEMA Should Exist
Less than a year after firing Cameron Hamilton for testifying that FEMA shouldn't be eliminated, Trump plans to nominate him to permanently run the agency. Hamilton was given a lie detector test and accidentally tipped off to his own firing.
Trump Administration Proposes Solving Government Building Maintenance Issues with Literal Magic Paint
The White House has formally submitted plans to coat the Eisenhower Executive Office Building with what Trump calls 'magic paint.' Preservation experts warn the miracle coating could cause irreversible damage to the 1888 structure.
Nation's King Graciously Permits Millions to Publicly Protest Nation's King
Eight to nine million Americans freely assembled to announce that free assembly is under threat. The king, who is not a king, was unavailable for comment. The deleted video was also unavailable.
House Adjourns Itself Before Congressman Can Finish Sentence, Sets New Land Speed Record
The complete official transcript of the session runs to one sentence. A war continued unaffected. Rep. Ivey's mouth remained open. The gavel has been secured.
DHS Confirms $1 Billion Worth of Warehouses Are, In Fact, Warehouses
After a thorough review, the Department of Homeland Security has verified that eleven large, empty buildings are large, empty buildings. Officials are proud of the loading docks.