⚡ Congress Cancels Remaining Work Day to Campaign on Record of Hard Work ⚡ FAA Solves Staffing Crisis By Withholding Pay From Understaffed Staff ⚡ Government Heroically Rescues Americans From Fees Government Created ⚡ Government Fires 256,000 Workers, Saves $0, Hires 104,000 More ⚡ Nation Celebrates 250 Years of Self-Governance by Asking for More Money to Cover Its Own Birthday Party ⚡ Department of Energy Lawyer Helpfully Explains That Science Grants Were Canceled Because Science Lives in the Wrong States
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2026 The Govment Gazette  ·  40 Articles Published
Congress Cancels Remaining Work Day to Campaign on Record of Hard Work
Legislative Achievement  ·  SEP 18, 2026

Congress Cancels Remaining Work Day to Campaign on Record of Hard Work

Speaker Johnson scraps the House's final voting day, citing member need to go explain to voters why Congress deserved more time.

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Latest Dispatches
FAA Solves Staffing Crisis By Withholding Pay From Understaffed Staff
Fiscal Mysteries

FAA Solves Staffing Crisis By Withholding Pay From Understaffed Staff

Congress funded a 2.8% pay bump to lure more air traffic controllers to a system desperately short of air traffic controllers. The FAA is now withholding it until controllers demonstrate they are no longer short-staffed. The controllers are short-staffed.

SEP 14, 2026 Read →
Government Heroically Rescues Americans From Fees Government Created
Fiscal Mysteries

Government Heroically Rescues Americans From Fees Government Created

In a bold act of fiscal innovation, the White House announced $500 rebate checks for Americans overcharged on health insurance premiums — premiums that doubled or tripled after Congress let ACA subsidies expire this year. The administration, which previously promised $5,000 checks on Wednesday, $2,000 tariff dividends last fall, and $1,000–$1,500 HSA rebates that Congress rejected, assures the public this one is definitely real.

SEP 11, 2026 Read →
Government Fires 256,000 Workers, Saves $0, Hires 104,000 More
Fiscal Mysteries

Government Fires 256,000 Workers, Saves $0, Hires 104,000 More

The Department of Government Efficiency officially expired on Independence Day without a closing report, a transition plan, or a farewell — just a USAJobs page with 104,000 new listings. The IRS, which lost 27% of its workforce in the name of efficiency, is now fast-tracking 8,000 hires to handle the backlog created by the 27% it lost.

SEP 07, 2026 Read →

From the Govment Archives

01
Congress Cancels Remaining Work Day to Campaign on Record of Hard Work

Speaker Mike Johnson canceled the House's last scheduled voting day Wednesday, sending lawmakers home for seven weeks ahead of the November midterms — just one day after telling reporters he had no plans to do so. The move conveniently avoided a floor vote on impeaching Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, a resolution introduced by a member of Johnson's own party, who then took to the House floor to rebuke the Speaker for leaving.

02
FAA Solves Staffing Crisis By Withholding Pay From Understaffed Staff

Congress funded a 2.8% pay bump to lure more air traffic controllers to a system desperately short of air traffic controllers. The FAA is now withholding it until controllers demonstrate they are no longer short-staffed. The controllers are short-staffed.

03
Government Heroically Rescues Americans From Fees Government Created

In a bold act of fiscal innovation, the White House announced $500 rebate checks for Americans overcharged on health insurance premiums — premiums that doubled or tripled after Congress let ACA subsidies expire this year. The administration, which previously promised $5,000 checks on Wednesday, $2,000 tariff dividends last fall, and $1,000–$1,500 HSA rebates that Congress rejected, assures the public this one is definitely real.

04
Government Fires 256,000 Workers, Saves $0, Hires 104,000 More

The Department of Government Efficiency officially expired on Independence Day without a closing report, a transition plan, or a farewell — just a USAJobs page with 104,000 new listings. The IRS, which lost 27% of its workforce in the name of efficiency, is now fast-tracking 8,000 hires to handle the backlog created by the 27% it lost.

05
Nation Celebrates 250 Years of Self-Governance by Asking for More Money to Cover Its Own Birthday Party

Congress allocated $150 million so the country could throw itself a tasteful 250th birthday bash. A Trump-backed group called Freedom 250 spent most of it, then held the party anyway. Now they'd like $10 million more, which experts confirm is how birthdays work.